Small Town Saturday Night, Mecca, Duggan and I hit Brandon

So this is a continuation of last night's blog, where I cautioned readers who don't like wrestling, to skim it and move on. Well part two is a perfect example of what wrestling people do after a show.

So, picking up where the show ended in Gladstone.

We pile into the Hogan limo-- the Yellow Sunfire with Red Leather Interior. Leaving Gladstone, Duggan assures us he will drive fast to get us to Brandon in 40 minutes. Fast is 120kms, which is still in the safe zone with most cops. We arrive in Brandon at about 11:20, and quickly proceed to the Victoria Inn to get a hotel room. Amber was working behind the counter, and I quickly began to use my single guy charm on her. It seems to work, as she informs us she was from Saskatchewan, sadly it is Estevan and not Rokeby (I would have citizen arrested her for her part in the "rib"). She also informs us that she has a boyfriend and that he is going to pop the question.

Straight up to the room. Duggan showers off the RME show sweat, from all the crowd heat. Mecca jumps in... After Duggan is done. Duggan does his hair and dresses. Mecca finishes his shower and begins to panick. There is no lotion in the hotel room. Frantic, Madison has nothing to mosterize his skin, he worries people might pick up an imperfection. He calls down to the lobby and they send up a cot for me to sleep on, and almond lotion. The night is saved.

Proceed to Houston's. Our desired destination. Danny being a doorman at Alive in The District, tells us he maybe able to get us through an unbareable lineup, by working "club courtesy". He gets to the front of the VIP line, and an utter jabrone (loser) is there to say no club courtesy. Fuck him. Mark. If the Rokeby Ribber is reading this, please rib any Houston's doormen you can find.

Frustrated, we as a trio move on to the Canad Bar there which is known as Road House, which to my recollection is just a cheap knockoff of Houstons. Mecca proceeds to tell Duggan how he should offer to grease a palm of a doorman, then when Duggan tells him then go do it, Mecca backs off and says, "No Duggan, that's your business, you know what your doing." Very humorous.

We get in with little resistance. Duggan and Mecca are of the belief they need to drink doubles quickly to make up for the lack of time to get shitfaced. It's 12:30 and we have 90 minutes to get attention from girls and get drunk. Hopefully both. Girls are selling us (making eyes), but aren't coming up, and everytime I initiate conversation I'm getting jobbed to a small package. And that hurts the pride a little. A dead ringer for an ex of mine, Cassandra Evers is there and I point out to Duggan there is a resemblance. Duggan likes. But Duggan is sad because he's got a lot on his mind. Mecca walks off with a different girl and it seems apparent he's getting "over" (meaning she is liking him).

Mecca walks back about 20 minutes later after going to do shots at the bar with the girl and a friend. Not going to lie, both Duggan and I were a little offended that he went into business for himself even though there was 4 girls at that table. We believe him to be covering his ass for a potential strike out with this female when he tells us (verbatim) "Dude, that girl is like in my imediate family!" To me and Duggan it seems that would end any further angling towards her, other than maybe a polite good bye at the end of the night. Unfortunately we were sadly mistaken.

Duggan is next to get attention from a female, and sadly she was no good. From where I was standing, underneath an elevated dance perch I could see her upskirt, which does not make me a pervert (if I had taken a picture maybe, but I did not), her skirt was that short. I didn't like the view. Duggan got hog-tied into dancing with her, Mecca went to dance with his family member, and I was left to observe. No office for me. Hard to believe.

Keeping a keen eye on Mecca I notice him dancing close with his supposed family member. Some might even call it "grinding", though I won't go that far to torpedo a buddy for poor taste. What I can say was he spent 30 minutes dancing with her, with a smile that can be seen for miles (because he uses Crest white strips daily, his teeth actually glow under the black lights). At this point, it appears a guy actually blocks Mecca out, and he should do the appropriate thing and step off the dance floor, as now it just appears he is dancing alone. He does not, he continues to dance but now it's a bigger number of guys to girls, which is never a good sign.

Meanwhile Duggan is trying his hardest to get away from his girl. At one point he even reached for my hand, an obvious feed for the "hot tag" (reference to an old school tag-team wrestling match), but I go heel and no sell. I'm totally Rick Martel during the Strike Force tag, only I'm selling my wounded pride of being left all alone as opposed to any injury. Duggan finally manages to get away, it may have been a forearm to the back, but maybe it was just a cowardly scoot, but he finds his way back to me with this sad report "Man, she stinks. Reeks bad. I can't be around her. It's terrible". Unlucky prick. Sometimes no office is good office.

Mecca is still on the dance floor believe it or not, even after the music is playing. He's investing a lot of time with this "family member" and he's not going to settle for anything less than a nice hug. We find the sister of the female in question, and ask if Mecca is family. She's says "sorta". Apparently Mecca's dad Senior Mecca is engaged to the aunt of these two attached females (making matters far worse, he's willing to wreck marriages within his own family!). The sister tells us that "by blood it's perfectly acceptable, however the next family function would not be cool at all." Mecca doesn't care, he's put the time in, if it's there he may well go for it. No dice, she's not buying, he's selling like it's probably for the best "Dude, I wasn't trying to book (Score), I was just having fun." I believe him, because that would have been just plain wrong.

Now it's my turn to rib. Every guy I walk buy who even faintly resembles somebody I know, I start calling out their name and shaking their hand. I mistook Brandon local flunkies as Ronnie Attitude, Scotty Styles, Kevin Thorn, Rob Royce, among others I'm sure. I see a horse's ass and call for Adam Knight, and it answers, big pop.

To the hotel, and the fun really begins. OBO has dispatched a security official for the lobby of the hotel. His name is Ian, and he's a complete dork. Dork isn't good enough, he's worse. One of those guys that takes life far to serious and has testicle notitus (nuts tied in nots). He pleads with us to keep the noise down. Duggan asks him "Ian really, what will you do if we get loud." Only answer Ian had "call the police and serve you with an eviction notice". Duggan sensing that Ian the testicular notitus victim is hungry, finds an apple from a display and offers him a snack by throwing it directly in Ian's chest. Coming from the Adam Knight school of playing it cool, Ian doesn't sell. Amber, the non Rokeby yet Saskatchewan native, gives me an extra breakfast voucher, we call for pizza and assure Amber we will send down some for her. She blushes and accepts.

We proceed to the room. As per the usual, some prank phone calls get made. Adam Knight, Rob Royce, Mike Arnott and Omar Nicholas are the targets. They get called stooges who may not be masculin for being so kiss ass-ish. I love you all for your brilliant no-sells.

We fall asleep. If I'm missing anything, Mecca and Duggan will post them in my comment section.